(as requested)




[POSTED BY MISHUKI]

The gobsmacked post audio messages.




[POSTED BY MISHUKI]

With the rise of Gayesh and Chris I am tempted to prolong my adventure at Hagakure.

Really, what's the worst that could happen. It's is months before I am scheduled to die. More on that later.

I aplied to be on Shipwrecked: Battle Of The Islands 2. How cool is that? It's cool. They put you on an island with basic food, cooking utensils, building materials and some tools and then that's all. Build a shelter, cook food from scratch. Kinda like The Beach. Y'know with the carpetary and fishing details?

The application was long and weird. There were a fair few questions about my girlfriend and I can't imagine why. Why did they need to know about her? It's slightly concerning but I'm sure it will be fine.

I have to go. Bye!


[POSTED BY ADAM]

Give me back my words so that I can eat them please.

Thank you. Those words were even more delicious going back down than they were on the way up.

I'm Gayesh, for those of you that don't know me. Although, identity is irrelevant. What's important is being able to identify.

-You know, he might just have something there.-

This blog is nothing short of recherche. I can only attempt to express my elation about being a part of it all. I encourage all of you (Hey, you there! Pay attention!) to read and comment as often as your life's commitments allow.

I emphatically deny that I am only here to play on Teigan's (may the spirits allow him into their world) well-developed sense of paranoia. Whoever would even suggest such a thing should be hurled up against a wall (any wall will do, really) and shot, splattering their vitals in an aesthetically pleasing pattern.

RIP Clexa. She was great while she lasted. The call of the real world must have been too much to withstand.

Bentendo's taste in music (negative and positive) is excellent. I will have words with anyone who says otherwise. They will not be nice words. They will be cat-like, sharp, wounding, biting, cutting and spitting words.

Titan is....alright, as long as he doesn't get too Titan-(s)ic on anyone's asses. (If you don't know what I'm talking about, you'll soon find out.)

Adam has arms. I know he has arms, because one of my spirits told me. If anyone tries to take away his arms, boy. You're gonna get it too.

By the way, I'm gay. If anyone here has issues with that, I heartily invite them to partake of a frisbee. If it is the case that such a person has already eaten a frisbee, I'm confident that another orifice could be found to insert a frisbee into.

Viva Hagakure.


[POSTED BY MALTA]

today i went to work, then i went to the gym then i went to a punk show. now i am drinking with teigans ghost.

an interesting and full day

i cant believe that no one agrees with me on robbie williams hatred.

oh well...

'take that' well amazing 'east 17' not as good, 'bros' mmm... your favourite boyband? mine nkotb, maybe backstreet boys, fucking americo trash....


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

last night, with very minimal research i bought an mp3 player off ebay. i think the thing is coming from singapore. they said two weeks for delivery, i can feel the tension. after waiting 29 years to own one can i wait a few weeks more? i'm hoping so, i need something to drown out hated songs of the day and bad
conversations on the tram.

also today for the first time in my life i went to ikea. i dont think that i will do that again.

hated song: today is actually an artist. today and most other days i hate robbie williams.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

today i hated the dubious pleasure of hearing the new shannon noll song a couple more times than i would have liked. shannon noll, for non australian readers came second in the australian idol competition a few years ago. thank you reality tv.

now, i dont know what the song is actually called but it has the amazing lyric "tell me where does the circle end? theres no beginning". poetry.

again i would not advocate trying to find this piece of "music". trust me, this song is truly awful.

to make up for hearing this song more than once today i listened to the classic death metal album 'slaughter of the soul' by "At the gates". every song on this record is much better than anything by shannon noll or any of his Idol? compadres.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

today and most other days i hate the song "someday someday" by thirsty merc.

i should not need to explain this to anyone. i hate it so much that i do not advocate downloading it to hear why i hate it.

band pimping of the day: (woohoo new idea) everyone should find copies of "the wrangler brutes" or any other of sam mcpheters projects. one reason for this is the lyrical genius of "male fraud, go bald."

party on everyone and those who applied look for invites soon.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

I am the new member. Hey, the core of my being explodes with excitements and a kind of delight to be seeing you so happy right now. It's really something and not if there is any mistake to be made, it is mine, okay?! Sure thing.

You are dangerous and sexual in a cool and subliminal distinguishment. You may well believe I am saying these only to be pleasurable, but there is no sophisticate or hidden meanings dwelling beneath the appearance on the surface. Believe you me blog readers! I would not be a question!

But there is okay. Okay?!? It is really quite something.

So, I ride the tram car on occasional and see the sites, did you realise that? It can really get me going in my heart (and lungs too!) Maybe so. Perhaps there is no answer.

That's the best. Until next time, keep grinding the axis powers blog readers! I'll see you again perhaps and we can make dark and coruscating underpinnings for each other. I'd like that so much!! It's amazing and unusual.

xx mishuki


[POSTED BY MISHUKI]

Slick with that sarcastic slew or phrases like 'I thought you knew', It has my duty to inform the blogging public about the plans currents washing over the face of Hagakure419 HQ.

Captain Bentendo and I have grown weary of this cult blog. Teigan is already dead and our mysterious and possibly demonic newcomer, Mr. Ventura AKA Mishuki is scaring us slightly. All this is not because of the response or the readership that this blog gets. In fact, the response and readership is positively positive. Is it because of the tremendous amound of chi energy that is drawn from us all to simply write here. And moreso, the responsibility to continue writing even when the lack of energy has left you bleeding on the floor, blood trickling for the corner of your mouth and eye.

The sanctioned rules that govern our behaviour is too much. The headaches are too much.

And with that I propose a hand-over. Bentendo agrees and Mishuki appears to have no objection although believes we can live on. What I plan to do, and it is up to the others to stop/coerce me, is to solely invite up to four people. Then, whoever I pefer or whoever accepts first will be granted my place amongst the Hagakure Elite.

Ben, Mishuki, do you want me to run it by you guys first or would you prefer if it was a surprise?


[POSTED BY ADAM]

Axpuir3d.

Hagakure Enterprises and its affiliated properties most sincerely thank joo.













Super excellent!!!!!!


[POSTED BY MISHUKI]

i'm trying to decide what to do with this blog.

any help would be greatly appreciated.

as a follow up to a previous post my record eventually arrived. so any offer of free euro travel to fight someone has now expired.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

yesterday, i smashed into a car while driving a forklift. it was cool, i broke headlights.

the best thing is that my companies insurance will have to pay for my incompetence.

hooray for unlicensed forkift driving.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

well kids the preceeding posts are a very accurate description of what beer does to you.

today my brain hurts. and i'm a little confused.

out


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

Don't look me, I don't know what's going on either.

"Come on Hawking, let's sing a song!"


[POSTED BY ADAM]

so i'm starting a poll can i bentendo carry teigans dead body to coburg?

vote now?

teigans corpse should be able to sort out the details.
we got to bury it. its starting to stink.

RIP sammy


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

Applications close Sunday 14th of May

From: Chase Ventura
To: Hagakure 419
Subject: Survivor Hagakure 419
Date: 30 April 2006 2:52:26 PM

Hail entertaining and elitist exclusionists!

Firstly, I would like to establish that I don't particularly want to join your crappy club. It somehow feels as though I have ever so many more important items on my personal agenda.

Although, I can't help but be intrigued by proclamation. Teigan, committing seppuku? Will wonders never cease? I do allow for the possibility that the voluntary cessation of his life on this planet via the cunning application of a frisbee is a sham. Call me cynical, but, my running theory is that this whole exercise is simply an effort to a) generate/maintain interest in the blog, and/or b) enable the alleged dead man walking to rid himself of annoying admin duties.

I have to pay the effectiveness of the ploy, as I'm quite curious to see if anyone, apart from freakazoids like Christina Titan, would be willing to jump through the requisite hoops in the hopes of obtaining club membership. Though, it can't be denied that the possibility of becoming custodian of Adam's entire existence might be found enticing by certain parties.

Just on another point, not that I'm pedantic or anything, how can it possibly be the case that there are no criteria? If you have no basis on which to make your selection, it stands to reason that a selection could not be made, until such a time as appropriate criteria could be found and put to use. (Get to work, you lazy criteria!) However, I've taken the statement to mean that the only relevant criterion, at this point in time, is how popular the "applicant" is in general with the current members (similar to any number of other social networks).

On one hand, I like the idea of selecting an individual based on merit if indeed, that is what you are doing. On the other, the idea of inviting blog patrons to submit an application to justify their "worthiness" for the purposes of posting on your blog, and to receive whatever form of (probably public) humiliation the elimination process will take, does inspire the following reaction; "Oh, the humanity..." The whole concept is a bit interesting, though. Reality blog. The term doesn't really fit, taking into consideration the nature of blogs, but, I applaud the creativity of The Emperor in assigning you this task. Or, rather, that of Top Ninja, Head Honcho, King Pisshead, or whomever else it is in Tokyo that you've all (apparently) sworn loyalty to. Anyway, needless to say, there's a lot you could do with the idea.

Enjoy your arbitrary human value assessment game!

Kind Regards,

Chase

P.S. I don't care if you post this email or not. Though, I'm operating under the following assumption: not.


From: Hagakure 419
To: Chase Ventura
Subject: Re: Survivor Hagakure 419
Date: 11 May 2006 7:26:51 PM

Dear Mr Ventura,

Thank you for your interest in Hagakure 419.

I can hereby confirm that your submission has been approved. Upon provision of your Blogger account details, you will be offered the opportunity to post to the weblog on Friday the 19th of May 2006. An exact time will be supplied closer to the day.

If you are unable or unwilling to post on the specified date at the specified time, you will be eliminated.

We are glad that you find our concept interesting. Your references to Tokyo, however, appear based on pernicious misinformation concerning the senior management of H419 which should be entirely disregarded.

To address your other points:

I can assure you the death of Magister Teigan von Drake is no 'sham'.

When Magister Bentendo stated that there were no criteria pertaining to our current process of elimination, he meant precisely that. Your observations concerning the wide interpretability of the phrase "there are no criteria" are acknowledged.

Mr Chris Titan has indeed been, to date, the sole applicant apart from yourself.

Regards,

Gyrjzlch Dostoyevski
Head of Development
Hagakure 419



[POSTED BY TEIGAN]

Like the man says.

It rained a lot yesterday. No sign of the slinky.

I am nearly done choking to death - archiving my blog; finally clearing / spiking my notorious, debilitating mail backlog, putting everything to bed. I took photos of all my lists of things to do for the last twelve months. I thought I might make them into art.


[POSTED BY TEIGAN]

nothing to report, sorry. its been quiet. only things to report are that clexa moved out. i went to tattoo convention. and today i ate a lamb kebab, this is only newsworthy because i tend not to dine out on meat.

otherwise really nothing is happening. i bought some food. um, i went for a bike ride. see nothing. its really good, yet really hard to make into interesting blog fodder. i still hate nickelback. but today i hate the rogue traders even more. i guess that was a no brainer. um...

oh yeah i'm in the process of being dicked around by some guy on ebay who is not sending me the record i won at auction, (note to self dont buy single records from europe), i won the record for 3 euro but it was like 14 euro postage. i failed. so if anyone is in italy preferrably near rome and would like to go beat this guy up for taking my money and not sending the record please get in touch with us. also if you are somewhere else in europe and can get really really cheap flights to rome i will buy these tickets for you so long as you go and punch this guy in the nose and get photo evidence. i need this negative FX lp.

see nothing is happening. the miners are still stuck down the mine. stupid miners.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

Link to be used in conjunction with message.


[POSTED BY TEIGAN]

today is the 4th of may 2006, so 04/05/06. i think thats cool. i was trying to post this at 1.23pm so it could be 1.23 04/05/06. i'm i nerd i know


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]

I wrote this song about you:

This place is a prison
And these people aren't your friends
Inhaling thrills through $20 bills
And the tumblers are drained and then flooded again
And again

Ther're guards at the on ramps armed to the teeth
And you may case the grounds from the cascades to puget sound,
But you are not permitted to leave

I know there's a big world out there like the one i saw on the screen
In my living room late last night,
It was almost too bright to see
And i know that it's not a party if it happens every night
Pretending there's glamour and candelabra
When you're drinking by candlelight

What does it take to get a drink in this place?

What does it take, how long must I wait?


Actually, that was just This Place Is A Prison by The Postal Service. I would very much like to show you where it can be downloaded but I can't find it anywhere...

...can you!?


[POSTED BY ADAM]

teigan is dead. he went honorable way, seppuku. actually you killed him. cunts.


[POSTED BY BENTENDO]